Call 911 To Report My Marijuana Was Stolen

A Wichita man called 911 to report he was the victim of an armed robbery. The theft? A pound of marijuana worth about $1,100 that he had been trying to sell at his home.

The victim told police that a buyer had pulled out a sawed-off shotgun and stole the drugs.

Police brought in a drug-sniffing dog to the house and located more marijuana and drug paraphernalia.

The victim was booked into Sedgwick County jail on several charges, including possession with the intent to sell drug.

The thief has not been found.

Murmer The Butt Of All Jokes At Monacan High School

Richmond VA teacher Stephen Murmer is a fun, popular art teacher who is always quick to crack a joke. But there is another side to Murmer. A side that has agitated school officials and resulted in his suspension and made him the butt of jokes among the students that focuses, almost entirely, on the crack in his backside.

Outside of class and under an alter ego, the self-proclaimed "butt-printing artist" creates floral and abstract art by plastering his posterior and genitals with paint and pressing them against canvas. His cheeky creations sell for hundreds of dollars.

Chesterfield County school officials did not like his ass, and placed Murmer on administrative leave from his job at Monacan High School.

Murmer contacted the American Civil Liberties Union of Virginia after he was suspended. He told them that administrators had suspended him with pay for five days because of his work as a butt-print painter and that he also could face unpaid suspension pending an investigation.

Murmer has been instructed by the school administration not to speak with the media.

Murmer went to great lengths to keep his work life separate from his activities as an artist. As a butt-printing artist, he goes by the name "Stan Murmur," and appears in disguise in photographs and videos promoting his art.

As a public employee, he has constitutional rights, and he certainly has the right to engage in private legal activities protected by the First Amendment of the Constitution.

A nearly naked Murmer expressed concern about remaining incognito during a 2003 appearance on the now-canceled cable television talk show, "Unscrewed With Martin Sargent." In a clip from the show, available on YouTube.com, Murmer dons a fake nose and glasses, a towel on his head, a black thong and nothing else.

"I'm certainly proud of the ass painting," Murmer said in response to questions about his disguise. "I do have a real job where I do have real clients and I don't think they'd be too understanding if I was also the guy who painted with my ass."

Small Indian Men Speak Up

India men complain condoms designed to meet international size specifications are too big for many Indian men as their penises fall short of what manufacturers had anticipated, an Indian study has found.

The Indian Council of Medical Research, a leading state-run center, said its initial findings from a two-year study showed 60 percent of men in the financial capital Mumbai had penises about 2.4 cm (one inch) shorter than those condoms catered for.

For a further 30 percent, the difference was at least 5 cm (two inches). A poor fit meant the prophylactics often didn't do the job they were bought for, and led to some tearing or slipping off during use.

"One of the reasons for a failure of up to 20 percent (of condoms) is the association of the size of the condom to the erect penis," the council's Dr. Chander Puri told Reuters.

"We need more vending machines for condoms of different sizes so people can pick a condom with confidence that is suited to their needs," he said.

The Times of India reported and entitled its story "Indian men don't measure up."

Keep It Down, We're Watching TV

A South African couple have been ordered by their village chief to hold off on their love-making sessions until after 10:00 pm following a string of complaints about their howls of passion.

Neighbours of Emily Dolo and her boyfriend Barnett Motloung, who live in the eastern state of Mpumalanga, had complained to the village kgosi (elder) that their meals and television watching were being disrupted by the amorous couple for hours at a time.

"I have a nine-year-old boy and he always asks what is happening every time the woman screams," one neighbour told The Sowetan daily.

Dolo was initially ordered to stop making a noise when the couple were summoned to a tribal council but the elder later ruled that they must limit their sex sessions to between 10:00 pm and 5:00 am.